"Savory (And with Malice)" by Richard F. Yates

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Creator's Description:

Out walking in the dessert a few weeks ago, when a strange scene popped in front of my beady, dry, bright red eyes! A U.F.O. shot overhead (and I SWEAR I heard a Judas Priest song playing from the dang thing as it cruised across the sky...)

And, as I continued … (read more)

Out walking in the dessert a few weeks ago, when a strange scene popped in front of my beady, dry, bright red eyes! A U.F.O. shot overhead (and I SWEAR I heard a Judas Priest song playing from the dang thing as it cruised across the sky...)

And, as I continued to walk, I spotted a pale green ghost who was watching a kinetic sculpture being put together by a floating squid. (Floating... How pretentious!) The contraption clicked and buzzed and clanked and rattled, somehow suspended a few meters off the ground by some unseen force. It's possible that it was just being held up by fishing line, perhaps anchored to the fishing-rods of some intergalactic space-fishing aliens, but regardless of HOW it was floating there, the mystifying (and clearly ingenious) sculptural mechanism appeared to be POWERED by a giant mosquito! (I found the whole thing to be well made, thought provoking, and frightening, but also kind of funny! Even if the squid WAS a bit pretentious, he was clearly a talented artist.)

The ghost asked, "But what does it mean?"

The squid just shook his head, sadly, and continued to connect gears and planks and eyeballs and flowers to the structure, securing them by whatever means it was that was keeping the whole thing floating above the ground.

I watched for what seemed like HOURS, but was actually only eleven minutes, until a gigantic sand goblin appeared beneath the sculpture and, howling with hunger, the creature proceeded to EAT the artwork, the squid, the ghost, the mosquito, and (jumping and swiping with the speed of a highly trained Boy Scout) even the U.F.O., which had flown back by to have another look at the squid's work. (The craft was blaring "You've Got Another Thing Coming" as it disappeared down the sand goblin's gullet!)

And it's because of crap like this happening that I try really hard to avoid going to eastern Washington. We don't have much dessert on the western side of the Cascade Mountain Range, but we do have lots of trees and plenty of green spaces and more than enough rain---but at least we don't have to worry about frickin' SAND GOBLINS, and that alone makes me think it's the right decision to stay home and avoid traveling! Who knows what OTHER freaky things might be out there!?!?

---Richard F. Yates (Holy Homebody)

P.S. - This drawing (created from my memories of the event) is ink on found cardboard with digital embellishments and color. 2019.

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Richard F. Yates's Recent Collectors

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