"Hydra (Variation 3)" by Richard F. Yates

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Hydra wasn't happy... It's not his fault, and he TRIED to be a good monster, but even in a TUX, he just didn't really fit in at parties. In his teens, he'd cracked his head in a car crash---and that's when the first snake appeared...

Several years later, in college, he … (read more)

Hydra wasn't happy... It's not his fault, and he TRIED to be a good monster, but even in a TUX, he just didn't really fit in at parties. In his teens, he'd cracked his head in a car crash---and that's when the first snake appeared...

Several years later, in college, he woke up with a red and orange snake jutting out of the back of his head, but he had no memory of what had happened. (There was blood all over the dorm, but he wasn't sure if it was HIS blood or someone else's...)

The final creature, the blue and green one with horns, came out when he'd actually started to slide into true nastiness. He'd had some bad years, and needed money, so he did something drastic, and he'd been shot in the head while trying to rob a liquor store... (He was arrested the next morning---there were only a couple of people living in Henpeck, Washington, with snakes jutting out of their heads, and since all of the rest of them were gorgons, Hydra was easy to identify as the would-be thief.)

He realized, looking in the mirror of his cell, that he needed to clean up his act. After his two year sentence was up, he got a job as a server at a posh hotel restaurant, and he's tried to keep all four of his noses clean ever since---but he still blacks out from time to time, and his dry cleaning bill is outrageous, considering how frequently he needs to have blood removed from his clothes... Whose blood? He's really not sure...

At least he hasn't grown any more snake heads in a while. That's good, at least. Try to be good, Hydra. We'd hate to see you with MORE snakes... (You already scare my wife...)

[Sorry about this one! I know it's weird... But I do like the image!]

Okay, how about THIS! STORY TAKE TWO!!!

Hydra was a suave, super-agent for a secret government agency... "Give me a Rum and Coke! Shaken, not stirred," he'd often say, then saunter over to the attractive female monster-bird, in the slinky black dress, preparing to begin his coy interrogation moves...

[The possibilities are endless!]

---Richard F. Yates (Holy Fool)


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